A House of Cards: Jesters And Jokers Sequel
by JoJoking
Summary: Sequel to Jesters and Jokers. Jessica's life remains in chaos, with the torment of darkness consuming her will she be able to refrain, or how far down the rabbit hole of the Joker's madness will she fall?
1. Did You Miss Me?

After what had occurred within the previous months life was never to be the same. The J symbol embedded on my skin would never be one of regret regardless of what others could possibly have thought. And now, I was back. We were back. The club was flooded as usual and as my eyes remained on his, a smile cast across my lips and it was as though a film flushed over my eyes but I felt like a new person, as though my sight was hooded with passion and need. In my heart I knew I should wait on Jane, she had done her best for me and my 'recovery', more than any friend could have asked for. But every bone in my body felt compelled to walk to him.  
Eyes were on me, analysing my every move as more and more people began to note who I was. Yet none had thankfully noted what, or who, I was staring at. I questioned whether I'd have time to go over and talk before Jane returned but this quickly was erased as I felt her hand on my shoulder, her cold metal rings against my bare skin tearing my eyes from their position. Thoughts plagued my brain, the familiar scent of his cologne filled my nose as though it was smothering me, yet I knew it would be impossible for me to smell such a thing when he was so far away. Yet he felt so close.  
How was I meant to know if he truly still cared? Possibly everything he had said before which had hurt me so deeply was true. Yet every moment I glanced at him I fell once more for his magnetic aura.  
"Are you alright?" Jane's voice tore me from my thoughts, grounding once more in the original plan to simply have a normal night. I should owe her that at very least, to at least not run into the arms for a third time of a madman. A madman that no one could tame yet my heart sought and fought so dearly to do that one impossible thing.  
I grinned, nodding, forcing myself to smile through tears which suddenly happened to blur my sight which I hadn't noticed. Her perfect eyes filled with unease as she watched me grab two shots off a woman's tray and throw them back without a second thought as the alcohol burned at my throat.  
I sauntered to the other side of the room, new found confidence filling me and yet instead of being relieved to see him, anger was installed within me. How could he summon me? He had left me stranded for months! People thought I was insane for thinking he cared, for thinking he would return for me and here I am, having received a note I jumped at the chance at the tiniest idea that he might be there with such a request. And I came as he beckoned. But no longer, he had got me as far as the dancefloor but now I needed to know he would take those final steps. I wasn't going to become another Harley, to be discarded to the side at his will and to rope back in his boredom. I demanded to be more or nothing. Yet of course the idea of nothing made my stomach ache in ways never known and the thought of telling him – a criminal mastermind – it was over seemed rather unlikely.  
As I swayed on the floor the music appeared to take control, it wasn't its usual loud pulsing beats as it had been when we entered but instead its words spoke to each and every member within this club. Someone at some point within this place had experienced torment, hurt, or love that was lost. That was after-all the only reason to come to such a place, to feel alive once more like you did when all was alright, when you were consumed with passion that could never be conquered – or so everyone thought. It would be the only reason to come to such a place: to have adrenaline purse through your veins at the danger, particularly with his return, and hope that maybe that one person would walk through those club doors and take you away to a safe place. Yet it never happened.  
Jane would pair up with uncountable numbers of beautiful men, teasing them in her innocent pure way and yet every single man that gazed at me with lust or any form of interest remained distant in their stance as though I were tainted, diseased, cursed. His eyes were unbearable as they cascaded across my skin from his spot in the VIP section. I could feel his anger bubbling as the minutes passed that I paid no attention to him. Though my determination was wavering and I could feel myself begin to slowly drift closer to the steps that lead to his station. Was he really prepared for me to be the one that walks away?  
Jane departed with a man, though she said it was only for a cigarette – a habit she felt disgusted by despite having me as a friend who apparently no longer cared for her initial wellbeing now as I found one frequently within my fingers over the past couple of months – and so I knew it could possibly be an inkling to find an empty side street for a few minutes…  
With her leaving my side I struggled to focus my eyes anywhere else than him. I longed for the warmth of his hands to brush my shoulders, to flick my hair off the nape of my neck as his body stood towering behind mine. My eyes sealed at the thoughts, any form of attention I could receive from him was all I could ask for.  
It was no longer so simple, I wasn't to be rescued by a man, by a bat. I was no longer in danger. But instead I was complicated within myself. I was no longer anything like I used to be, I could still remember that girl. And yet now I was imperfect, I am good yet flawed. Without the love of such another broken individual I was lonely most of the time. The girl of beauty and hope filled eyes despite the torment and pain that she had experience was gone, yet used to be mine. The pain of everything I had gone through seeped through my veins and ached as I swayed to the music, every scar I had received felt as though it reopened. I needed my adrenaline rush. I needed him. A man that uses and abuses and can't love. Yet that was all I could ever want and ask for.  
Cold rings touched my skin, the rest of the hand on my arm radiating with warmth and I smiled to myself – the imagination of such a feeling making me want to cry as bodies around me swayed. The idea of him truly noticing me, caring enough to come forward pulling every heart string and valve that would be possible. I turned to the imaginary warmth and stood doe eyed.  
My breath hitched as his fingers trailed across my skin rising to my neck where it burrowed in the curve, my head automatically tilting into its warmth. The tears returned and I fought them as they threatened to spill down my beautifully manicured face which Jane had spent ages on. The pain of any wounds suddenly were swept away. I rose my hand and trailed it along his lips, red printing onto my fingertips as his famous smirk swept across them, his eyes alight with fire and ice as they gazed manically wide. I glanced down at the red and smudged it between my fingertips, two tears managing to escape as hair hung over my face - hiding and shadowing it as he scanned every inch of movement I made. He was real.  
"Did you miss me?" his familiar American twanged voice gleamed.  
Without thought I pulled myself to him, my hand gripping into his green hair as our lips met. The tears continued to stream individually, gracefully, out of happiness rather than sadness. He was back. We were back.


	2. We All Fall To Darkness

I could feel the eyes of others within the club staring, glaring, their mouths muttering words of disgust or shock. Realisation befalling on those who hadn't yet identified me and yet not a care in the world came my way. I grinned up at the monster himself, his eyes like crystals as the light of the club continued to bounce off the blue irises.  
"You left me" I claimed, my voice attempting to rise above the sound of the music yet my voice hitching from the shock of his mere presence still taking hold.  
His smile appeared to widen, his lips somehow intact, the familiar gleam of his metal teeth and his brows arching. "So I'll take that as a yes?"  
Narrowing my brown eyes seriousness set on my face. "No. You left me, to be examined, interviewed, probed and prodded, to be left alone. No sign of a return, no hope or inkling that anything mattered. You left me."  
"Dollface, pumpkin, sweetie" his voice whined his head tilting to different sides yet his eyes remaining fixed on his prise. His voice cooed, patronisingly as he shushed my courageous outburst. "I am a joker… not a club, a diamond, a spade and certainly not a heart. An outsider. I may be among all" he gestured to the bodies filled in this club "these other cards. To be removed without anyone missing him."  
The idea of becoming attached, an expectation of himself from someone other than his crazy other mind sets, appeared to make him uncomfortable. To retreat within himself in a way no other situation could. J truly believed no one was to miss him. Feeling my unease and dissatisfaction with his answer he sighed, lowering his hand and slipping through his sleeked immaculate green hair.  
Suddenly he leaned in, his hand grabbing the back of my head, not allowing me to move as it had so many times before. My body seized in automatic retaliation, "but they always come in pairs" he grinned.  
I smiled, my lips pursing slightly as I felt the fire in my eyes begin to seize. I rose my hand to his at the back of my head, he allowed me to entwine my fingers before sliding it down to my cheek and yanking it suddenly away from me. Behind his shoulder I caught glimpse of Jane, if anything more it was a reason to escape the situation further. My head was brimmed with thoughts, of ideas and crazy paranoia that I couldn't stand by this madman and not end up annoying him to the point of murder – literally. Sure enough it may not have been me who ends up in the back of his van to be discarded but I wasn't about to let any soul in this club become victim to him, especially not Jane. For all that Jane was worth and the amount she didn't understand me, she was still the closest thing I had to family. She tried as she could to help, regardless of what that was, and would never judge, even in times I found myself judging me.  
I turned from J, I could hear his agitated groan begin to grumble louder and more vicious, his face no doubt contorting in anger at every step I took. I settled back into the spot among the swaying bodies - who did their best to not notice my presence – to where Jane had left me. Out the corner of my eye I saw Joker begin to heave in furious laughter his hands raising to his temples and pulling back his hair as though he were about to yank it out before he was joined by one of his men. Almost instantaneously he vanished, at first I thought I lost track of him through all the people but he truly disappeared.  
"You alright? You look as though you've seen a ghost?" Jane asked, her face suddenly appearing in my line of view. I snapped out of my thoughts and nodded, "too much alcohol I think, call it a night?" I asked.  
She nodded, "was getting bored of them here anyway" teasing me as she waved goodbye to one of her suitors and collected her things.  
Slumping once more on her familiar couch she positioned a glass of water by my side while sipping on hers constantly. The alcohol hadn't gotten to me, even though it was a desire. I gazed at the ceiling lost in thought, the feeling of being watched – and not by Jane who even in her drunken state would attempt to analyse my every move.  
"Something happened" she whispered, her voice croaking from the amount of singing yet the obvious concern in her voice still unwavering.  
"I thought…" I stopped myself, could I really tell her that he was there? She would no doubt do the decent civilian thing and put him back in jail.  
"You thought?"  
"I thought I saw him, it wasn't though. Just the reflection of the green light on someone elses hair." I sealed my eyes shut, darkness consuming my world as I tried to convince myself that's what truly happened. Yet evidently it was not.  
"Are you sure it wasn't him?"  
"100%, or even if it was he didn't want anything to do with me. The man stared me in the face and didn't give two hoots. No tattoos either… Don't worry Jane."  
Almost instantly relief dispelled her body, even from my eyes being closed I could tell her frigid state instead was replaced by a slump in the armchair as the water was placed on the table.  
"Good."  
"Good?" I beckoned.  
"I don't want you hurt… again."  
"I can take care of myself."  
"You've been going into extreme mode. You're at the gym almost daily – spending most of your time there. The idea of work now revolts you and you have this contorted view of society now. He got to you more than you think, Jess. Maybe you should rethink mo-"  
"I'm staying in Gotham, Jane." I knew exactly what she was going to argue. The idea had come from the police rather than herself but still I refused to move away. Sure enough the reasons I gave them were very different from the truth, I now was filled with this need to prove to myself that I was strong enough to handle the previous situations. That if anything like that were to happen again that I would instead be one fighting, not one sitting as a hostage. Up until this day however, it almost seemed as though the choice to which side to take would be easy – it would be his. And yet now, having looked him once more in the eye, I didn't know anymore.  
"If you're sure." She sighed, silence filling the room as she relented to my response.  
Minutes passed, though the torturous silence that instead allowed my brain to seize all opportunity to drive me insane. Memories flashed before me, torturing me in every word that he spoke that sucked me into his demeanour.  
"Rise and shine lovelies" a familiar voice called, way too close to having been Jane turn on the TV and from her previous heavy breaths I assumed she had fallen asleep in her seat. Immediately I flung myself up, pushing myself up by my arms and head whipping round to the door behind me. Jane was alert now too, screams ripping from her lungs as I rose to my feet to shield her behind me, telling her to be quiet as her hand held mine in fear.  
Joker stood there, gun in arm and his previously immaculate appearance already splattered with blood of a poor indiivudal he must have visited before us.  
"I gotta say" he grinned, flinging the gun to the floor. "I preferred your old apartment."  
Jane had thankfully fallen silent, yet as J stalked towards us every motion he took with pride, I could feel Jane tense behind me at the thump of the footsteps. His men guarded the door, Shiv no where in sight and no doubt once again horrified that I was pulled back into this scenario, I should have known it were to be too late.  
"Hiya girlie" his pale tattooed hand gripped my cheeks, squishing my face painfully together he flicked my head from side to side as though checking for damage. "C'mon no need to look so happy to see me now!" He cackled. Everything I had done in the club, the courage I had within me instead was replaced with guilt. I should have known this would happen. As soon as his hand left my face it was replaced with the back of his hand smacking me across the cheek, his ring slicing it open.  
Falling to the floor I only just caught myself on the table and watched as he pounced towards Jane like an animal. "Now. I do believe you are the one getting in the way." He twirled a strand of Jane's blonde hair, sweat matting it as she sat face to face with the Joker, alcohol no longer taking any effect as fear consumed her.  
"Leave her alone, J" I begged, pushing myself to my feet once more.  
He began to giggle, before rising to his full towering height and turned to me. He clicked his fingers and in an instant his men were grabbing Jane off the chair, a gun to her head as she muffled sobs, attempting to maintain silence if it was possible knowing that a crying sobbing women would not be a way to get on the Joker's good side.  
"You've got confidence now, little Jester! Now don't you tell me that I didn't have a part to play in that." He grinned, his hands embedded in his pockets, the open shirt stretching showing his pristine inked body.  
"What do you want? Whatever it is, she's not involved."  
He began to laugh once more and walked around the room, his fingers trickling along the different decorations Jane had so carefully placed out around the flat. He lifted one of the crystal statues of a women dancing as he flipped it from hand to hand without a care he drew in a large breath. "Oh but Jester she is. You see, I know you would have run straight back to me, no questions asked, if the good of this world hadn't…" his face screwed up in frustration as he attempted to keep his voice calm, "Hadn't of meddled in my work." He dropped the crystal allowing it to smash into a million pieces on the floor. The shards crunched under his suit shoes as he walked towards me, "of course, it wouldn't have mattered if it wasn't going to be my masterpiece. And then I got thinking… Should I … Or actually you… just make the decision to resume where we started, or kill off the nit picking bugs" a shard crunched as he stepped once again forward, a smile slinking across his face in satisfaction, "before this thought of re-entering society gets any bigger?"  
"J, I'll do what you want, just leave her be."  
"Ah-ah-ah" he was now right before me, his breath trickling onto my face as I glared up at him. I began to turn, his body following every move I made simultaneously as though he had already previously strategized them. "That was before I saw you. Of course, you didn't tell her that did you? That you flung yourself on me the moment I said hello."  
"I do recall you didn't say 'hello'" I snarled, just one more step backwards and I would have a plan.  
"Touche, but all the same, dollface, you walked. No-one walks. Now, are you going to make a move or shall I? Not that there'll be a different result. I need you to prove that my little Jester is somewhere still" he tapped my nose, "in", a third time, "there."  
I was finally by the table, I slipped my hand around the letter opener that had previously been stationed there as a gift Jane had received from her godmother.  
"Tick-Tock" his voice whined, leaning down, his eyes almost distracting me from my intention before he turned to face Jane and his men. "Just say when, Jester." He grinned.  
Jane was struggling against the men, yet her small frame was defenceless against them.  
"You want proof?"  
With the tilt of the back of his head it was nod. A nod that lead to me piercing his abdomen with the tip of the letter opener as I slung my arm around his neck, my tiptoes attempting to balance myself against his body.  
A hitch of his breath and his body tensed, his breathing rigid and a small amount of blood covered my fingertips. It wasn't deep enough to do much damage, I had made sure of that, yet it got my point across.  
"Let her go" I grumbled.  
Joker let through an agonised laugh, his fingers rising and falling as the men lowered their guns and pushed Jane towards us. I let go of J, the letter opener sticking out of his skin as his own blood further stained his shirt.  
"Oh Jester, you continue to surprise me" he ripped it out without thought or care. Jane once more hid behind me.  
"You asked for proof."  
"More than I could've asked for." He grinned before opening his now bloodied hand towards me, inviting me to join him once more.  
I slipped my hand into his nervously, "but she stays out of this."  
"As you wish" he grinned, his hand enclosed around mine before pulling and twisting me towards him so my back was aligned against his. "But don't do that again" he snarled before stabbing the letter opener into my abdomen, much further and deeper than I had. With a shriek from Jane, I fell to darkness.


	3. Intoxicating Danger

I awoke with a throbbing pain spreading across my stomach, though I knew my eyes were open I could see nothing. A cold solid floor was below me, my body had obviously been flung to the floor with force considering the pain radiating from my side that I lay on. Outstretching my hand my fingers quickly came into contact with a wall. Feeling around my area the room appeared bare, cold, and patches were covered in a water substance which I had a terrible feeling was escaping from my stomach where I could feel the pain erupt from.

Pushing myself to my feet, automatically bending over grasping my stomach. I was certain a few ribs were cracked and the gaping hole that had been created by the Joker had only barely been attended to - a punishment to remind me that if I was good, I would get what I needed. He certainly wasn't a man to enjoy being crossed.  
Fury burned within me as I recalled what had occurred - I had no idea if Jane was indeed safe, if Joker _truly_ was a man of his word, or how long I had been unconscious for. It could be minutes, hours, days. Jane at best would have no idea where I was, would be panicked and scared and no doubt have reported this to the authorities. Yet this time they would hear the story of how I put up a fight - I suppose then some news would insinuate I did stand for society rather than still be 'brainwashed' by the Joker and intend to rebel like so many liked to argue.

Stumbling around the bare room I finally came to contact with the other side, swiping my way around the wall, aiming to go from one corner to the next I sought for a door. With the place I had woken up in I assumed I would have been flung straight across the room. And with luck my hands finally slammed onto wood. Frantically I searched for a handle, my breathing rigid I could feel my body tempted to faint. Blood had erupted from my wound once again and I was losing it fast, the pain had become unbearable. But with being so close to leaving this room my body felt it was the best time to alarm me that I was in no fit state to continue a fight - rather than to go into fight mode. However, with determination I kept murmuring to myself ' _c'mon, so close, just c'mon Jess!'_ and finally I touched metal.

Tugging and twisting at the door knob, which was obviously old from the stiffness and reluctance to move, it finally clicked. It had been left unlocked. A smile tugged across my chapped lips and tears tugged at my brown eyes, he hadn't left me for dead but instead with a fighting chance.

The door squeaked open, yet with my emergency to get as far away from the darkened room which had began to make me think I was blind, I paid no head. I would take anyone on outside this room if it meant I could have a chance at being outside and having sight again and preferably someone to attend to my wounds properly. Light poured through the doorway, warmth grazing my cheeks as I closed my eyes. A huff of laughter left my chest as relief filled me. Yet as I lifted my foot and took one more step a thin, solid object smacked across my stomach, directly where my injuries were situated. I bent over in agony, clutching at my stomach, a whimper of pain escaping through my lips as my eyes became alert to the familiar cane that was slowly being lowered and stationed at my side, his pale hand enclosed over its intricate embellished head. I could hear him behind me. Rising to my full height his warm breath across the nape of my neck causing my skin to prickle, yet the warmth was inviting even if sinister.

"Dollface" his voice whined quietly, his lips could be felt next to my ear. His hand slowly crept onto my shoulder and slowly traced down the length of my arm.

My lips trembled. My security and confidence I had previously had, the anger that had built up inside me, vanished. Instead I felt fragile, child-like, in danger. "J" I whispered, the consonant barely audible. My hair was brushed to once side of my back, flicked over my right shoulder.

"I believe you have something to say?" He beckoned.

Silence. Perhaps there was some strength still within me as I willed myself not to say that word. Not to apologise for my own situation. He had made all of this happen, he the one who beckoned everyone to rebel demanded only loyalty and conformity from his own people. Hypocrite.

"No." I responded finally after he had nudged me for a response, threatening another hit with his cane. A quiet rumble of laughter left his chest, every rumble injected with danger.

Slowly I turned to face him, his eyes appeared tired, the black that usually surrounded his eyes were hauntingly deep suggesting that he had slept less than usual along with the lack of lipstick smothering his lips. His green hair however was immaculate. His arm snaked around my waist as a grin began to flash across his twisted smile.

"Careful what you're saying, Jester", his eyes darted across my features which I could see in his almost mirror like eyes were not at their finest. Blood was smeared across my face and dirt smudged across my cheek from where I had been laying.

I knew this man would torture me. He would leave me on tracks just to save me when a train comes by. He'd abandon me in the cold and save me when the snow covers my body. The man was dangerous and my blood boiled with the inclination to slap him. I detested the man. He lowered himself to his knees, dropping his cane to the floor and lifting my top slightly revealing the disturbing gash that was swollen. His face contorted with a variety of expressions, then he began to replace the taped stitches which were beginning to fall off - trying his best to fix the situation as much as he could at that time - he rose once again to his feet and sighed. He slid a hand through his intoxicating green hair, his warmth surrounding me as he placed a hand on the side of my neck, his thumb rubbing my jaw line delicately. This was also the man whose eyes appeared to have sincerity, fear, and love swirled in them. I melted. For some unknown reason as much as J revolted me I was inclined to still search for the good in him, or at least enjoyed the thought that he would express some kind heart to me. I tried to push the thoughts down, fighting with myself about who the man before me was. Good or bad? Loved or hated?

"I hate you." I seethed through my teeth before flinging my arms around his neck and pulling his body closer to mine. Dammit.


	4. Cancer

I still didn't know how long it had been. It could have been hours, days, weeks for all I knew. I sat, wrapped in a musty smelling blanket on a hard sunken couch. The luxury I had once experienced with my captor appeared to vanish - not only in material goods but in his eyes. I took another drag from the slim cigarette in my hand, my dry lips not wanting to tear away from the filter that sat between them.

I realised in that moment that the taste of the smoke was pleasantly intoxicating when alone. The wind that had swept my hair as I had stood in the cold breeze of Gotham city calmed the nicotine rush and chaos running through my mind. It had numbed it. The smoke would swallow and poison the fear and anxiety that would rush in my veins, filling it with a calm I had become addicted to - just as I became addicted to the vile line of tobacco that was limp in my fingers. Yet now, as I sat there in the same cold air, the smoke was his breath. It intoxicated me in a suffocating smoke that made my throat struggle to breathe. His eyes watched as I lifted and lowered my hand to my mouth, watched as I raised and lowered my chest as I drew in the poisonous air. They lingered as though he watched tumors grow before his eyes in my lungs. He made the substance appear toxic, more than what I already was aware of. He was the cancer that this disgusting silly thing that would once calm me could never cause.

I kept my eyes forward, my peripheral vision captured his pale figure yet I intentionally paid no heed. I watched as the city continued. Quiet from my position. It were the tale of a tree falling in the distance, yet no one was there to hear it. I considered whether I was now that tree. People knew of my presence, people knew of my missing. Yet if I were to fall - would they know?

The silence broke as my fingers twisted to flick the cigarette. The slight jolt appeared to bellow due to its comparison to the noise surrounding it. In almost synchronization he rose his position beside me. His grey metal eyes fixated on my emotionless face as he offered a hand. I slipped it in, his appearance ice pale skin matched the warmth of mine as he brought me to my feet.

Following him inside no words were spoken. His muscles that covered his body almost constricted any human movements, covering any indication that he was even breathing. He pointed to a bathroom, obediently I entered and heard the door click shut. I was alone.

Staring at the bruised and bloodied body that gazed tiredly back. It ached as I pealed the clothes off my body and entered the hot shower. The water scolding across the cuts still didn't burn the taste of him, the touch of him off my skin. I was unaware if the drops of water crossing my cheeks were tears or the shower. As much as I was disgusted by the man in the next room I couldn't ignore his presence. Not only physical presence but the one that consumed my mind and body to be brought to him.

This wasn't Stockholm syndrome, but something much more. He was cancer consuming my body and my brain to the point where I would be immobilized to his power. Yet I gave in to it. I wasn't fighting. I was okay with it.

Stepping out and drying myself off and using the amenities provided in the bathroom for myself I attempted to cover the darkness of bruises and cuts across my skin. I scraped back my hair and tied it up with the small hair tie I kept around my wrist, pulling the clothes on that were neatly folded on the toilet seat.

As though on cue, the door opened. J stood there, staring at me back in the mirror before a smile cast across his blood red lips and allowed the metal teeth to glint. Shadows enshrined his eyes. The demon glaring back at me snarled, "Ready to go play?"

I turned. I smiled.


	5. You'll Never Leave Me And It's True

The tight black trousers and revealing emerald green top made my previously tanned skin appear ghostly. I sat in the front seat of his Lamborghini once again, drumming my fingers nervously as I kept my eyes forward, staring at the stone wall it was parked before.

J was outside, his hand propped on top of his car as he leaned his weight through his arm. His other hand slunk in his trouser pocket as he giggled and cackled his speech to the grisly looking man in front of him.

I'd come up with the strategy of story telling in my head. Despite being oddly alright in my current situation - with slight arguments with my conscience occurring - it didn't prevent the fear of death consuming me. So instead I constructed stories in my head, as though I were writing a book, of the horrors that may occur. I had previously heard it helped Stephen King with his nightmares, making him the creator of some of the most horrific and terrifying stories. My poor, unknowing, and innocent main character faced many fates - none of which where certain. She, of course, resembled a more flawless and innocent version of my previous self. She could be sold, she could be raped, she could be shot point blank in a second without even being aware that her life was going to end. Yet she lay in the arms of a man she should not - yet did - trust. She was scared, she was bewildered. She was the weakness that I refused to show that would cower from her captor that she would obey. I on the other hand, often did the opposite. Which truthfully only lead to me being in the states that I was now in. Bruised, battered, cut, pained, and lost.

He swiftly slunk into the car, no effort needed. He flashed a grin at me as he let the car roar to life and I found a small smile play on my lips in return. My head was consumed with confusion as excitement instead twisted in my stomach suffocating the previously tormenting thoughts. He flicked on the radio, humming to the old ballad that began to play. It was as though he had chosen the song on purpose and quite honestly, it wouldn't surprise me if he had.

 _"Telling me there'll be no next time, If I don't treat you right"_ the old iconic voice harmonized. It was a familiar song, bringing me back to my childhood when my father would happily play his music on the road trips we had. Yet this felt more sinister. The meaning of the song hadn't struck me until now. The words sank deeper into my soul as I found the familiarity with not only the tune, but the situation.

I liked him too much. I knew it was true.

He grinned as he saw my face fall with the tormenting understanding, he stretched his arm over and grabbed a fistful of my hair playfully before scrunching it tighter and then releasing it, as someone would often do with their partners hand - not their hair.

I took his hand, his eyes curiously watching me rather than the dangerously busy road that was ahead of him as he drove, I placed his palm on my bruised cheek which currently appeared flawless. I leaned into his hand before twisting my head so it instead reach my lips, I placed a small soft kiss on the palm of his hand.

"You have to be prepared my little Jester. No more games I'm not a part of. You gotta be aware you aren't ever gonna be that far again." His voice was laced with venom, yet the fear in his eyes was still evident regardless how hard he tried to hide it. The evil smirk never once left his snowy face as he slid his hand back to the wheel and eyes diverted back to the road.

Only a small whisper left my lips: "I know."

Regardless to the twisted content in the song, it was also abundantly clear that there was a hint of appreciation and fondness intended to be directed to me. I had become his, his what I couldn't answer at that time. His possession? His obsession? His love? I couldn't tell. But he wanted me there. For whatever reason it was, and as much as the saneness in my head screamed at me to run, I knew I would always return to where I now belonged. On the underside of the rabbit hole.

I gazed down at my hands, clasped in my lap. I was acting so nervous, so withdrawn. I almost hated myself this way and fought for courage. For the fierceness I guaranteed myself to have. After all, J hated when I wouldn't react, when I wouldn't play along with his games and tricks and instead hid away as though I truly were the victim. I could no longer call myself that, regardless of the state I was in. He trusted me to the point where I could walk out the door and leave if I truly wished, there had been many opportunities to do so after all. I had only myself to blame for the danger I was now in. If I was as scared as I was allowing myself to act then why would I ever return to his club, why would I want his J tattooed on me, why would I be so repulsed by the help the authorities tried to give me. I looked to the man beside me, his horrific beauty still blew my mind. "Aren't we painting the most horrific picture of society?" I already knew the answer, it was inevitably true yet I knew I couldn't get out of the car now. It was too late.

A giggle left J's mouth, his eyes turned dark with a fire in his face and voice that left every word burning in my mind. "I guess when you turn off the main road, you have to be prepared to see some funny houses."

Somehow, it made perfect sense. We were the unusual, the things the mass of society rarely ever capture or witnessed. Yet we had the chance to express it, to take them on the road trip to our life, to our vision. To our sense in immortality that didn't lie with building foundations or structure, but instead with burning it down. With that one expression of his, the devil's voice became sweet to hear.


End file.
